I got squished...

I could use a little of this kind of tranquility right about now!

I can't believe how long it's been since I posted last! Things have been the general all around chaos of my life. So I'm not sure why I'm surprised.

Anyway... I went in for the "Boob Squish: last week... Unimaginable fun those...

And for the random guys out there reading this...Image taking your "boys" putting them between two Plexiglas panels and squishing them to about half their mass... Then hold still for 45 seconds... Yeah... It's that much fun. I don't know about your "Boys" but my "Girls" are very grateful that this testing is only required once a year!

Part of the utter chaos in the recent weeks had to do with the "squish"... They did some extra shots, then an ultra sound of one of my... nevermind. Of course with my health history... The extra attention really freaked me out.

The OB/GYN, then the mammography Dr. Reassured me they are certain it's benign, etc. etc. but that doesn't help much when you have a cancer history like mine. You know and believe them and what they're telling you... but your deep inside your mind that little nut of fear cracks and it whispers, "Maybe it's not gone..."

It is a feeling that can barely be described. After a couple days, I relaxed... Super-glued the nut back together and moved passed it. Then the GYN Doctor's Office called to tell me they want me to see a surgeon for a "Just in case" follow-up.

I cried for a full day.

Then I pulled myself together and made some decisions, one of which was I'm not going to see the surgeon. I figure since she removed two other benign breast lumps from me in the past 20 years, she doesn't need to see me... she can just review my test results.

For one reason, I think the OB/GYN Doc is just doing a little "CYA" and I also worry about the visit being paid for by insurance. She would be the third Doc involved, so why take the chance for non-payment without a concrete... "We need to know exactly what this is?"

So the nut is glued shut once again.

While I was dealing with that particular mindF***, something even better happened!! The transmission went out on my car! You wanna talk about a mindF***!!

It stands to reason. The car had very low mileage for a car that age, the body & exterior were practically pristine. Problem was that it wasn't driven the way I drive... not that I slam down the gas and don't do maintenance or anything like that, but I do drive everyday... that can be a bad thing.

In hindsight, the shape it was in should have been an indication of how big of a change would be taking place I after I got it. But can you do? Look at cars for sale in the $2000 range? Well over 100,000 miles easy.

Spend that on a car, tranny goes in seven months... yeah, that's what happens when you buy a car with high miles... well, the same applies with the lack of mileage on a car 15 years old. It all comes down to what's gonna happen is gonna happen.

What sucks is that to get it fixed would probably cost $200 to $250 over what I paid for it! It's such a fricking mess. It reminds me of the old saying (or was it just a t-shirt?) if it has "Boys" or "Wheels" it'll give you trouble! To be fair, there are ones out there that read "Girls" or "Wheels" of course, using boys & girls is just being polite with regards to wording for the post!

So other than that... weather's been up and down. Yesterday was wild! Massive thunderstorms rolled through, we got hail... again! It shredded some of my open lillies but thankfully didn't do much damage to the buds coming up behind the open blooms.

Wish that would have held true the last time we had hail... it really affected my irises. It was disappointing but I knew it was a possibility. So what can you say?

I say it's time to go and dry my dishes and throw another load of laundry in the washer... thrilling thought isn't it?