Where has the time gone?

A beluga whale spouting ~ Alaska in May, 2008

How amazing, huh? I can't believe two things associated with this picture... first, a beluga whale in the wild! no less! And second, how can it be three months since I saw it?

Cripes. The Fair is under way... a sure sign in the Not-So-Great-White-North that summer is winding down. I've started to notice some subtle coloring at the tops of some of the maple trees in my neighborhood.

I laugh to myself as I hear the groans and complaints of the children I encounter in the local stores. Poor things... walking behinds their Moms, dreading the questions, like... "What color notebook do you need for science?" "That shirt is not gross! It's just like the other ones you wear!"

I smile to myself and give thanks that those days are so far behind me. Of course, I'm counting the days (literally... only 25 ,more!) until I get smacked upside my head with the big 5-0!

Who knew?

I have to admit... it's a love/hate relationship, this whole continuing to get older thing.

I am suffering through such conflicting emotions. I wasn't supposed to see 30. Or the year 2000. So I'm elated and send a great big "nanner-nanner-boo-boo" out into the universe. Then I think, "Holy crap! I'm going to turn 50!"

That's where the real conflicts roar within. If I could jump for joy, I would. (Crutches are dangerous enough for me much less jumping.) Don't even get me going on the whole crutches thing! I'm completely thrilled when I can manage to go potty without breaking the shower door because of those freaking things!

Gees O' Pete's!!

In a lot of ways I feel deeply depressed as I am hitting this milestone in my life and I am not where I thought I would be at this stage of the game.

And just where might that be?

Anywhere than here I guess.

I find regrets flitting through my mind now and again. I feel quite accomplished in other ways.

I bought a book when I turned 40 titled, "It's Only Too Late If You Don't Start Now!" I probably should have read that. Maybe if I can find it, I'll give it another shot.

Then again... who's to say it's too late? 60 will be coming up much faster than I'll expect it too!

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!