AGH! It's that time again. Cripes.

Mom loved Humming Birds... so does my Aunt

So I guess this can be my one concession to them both. I'm not a bah-humbug person. Well, I didn't used to be. I can say all the standard excuses, it's too commercialized (oh yeah... that's so frighteningly true!) Or I don't subscribe to the whole religious angle. (I know some of you cringed on that one, sorry) then there's the whole "Holidays are too stressful" (Oh yeah!! I absolutely go along with that one!)

Probably the biggest obstacle for me is that I've never been able to single-handedly put the fun back in dysfunctional and after all these years... I am just too dammed tired to fricking try anymore.

Cop out? Maybe... maybe not. You can only bang your head against a brick wall for so long. For years, my Mom was a shameless instigator, now my brother has held the crown since Mom passed. Only he ramps it up so much it makes Mom look like a lightweight.

Pretty bad things to say about my family I know, but there does come a time when you just have to accept the inevitable and say, "Fu** it." Never thought I'd ever hear myself say or write those words but I'm on my way to 50 and I'm just too fricking tired of it.

Due to circumstances beyond our control, we've decided to try having a Christmas meal together at a restaurant. I'm sure this will be bitched about by my brother. Well, he can show up or not if it bothers him too much. Another plus is that in public he'll be less likely to go off on one of his rants or tirades. We think.

If not it just means that next year, I have Christmas with my Dad and whatever niece's decide to participate. I refuse to be held hostage by my brother's foul moods and negative energy, any longer.

What the hell is it that makes the holidays such a motherf***ing emotional roller coaster? Thank God for Valium is all I can say. One of my absolute favorite quotes of all time is courtesy of author Stephan King...

"God protects drunks, children and the cataclysmicly stoned." Viva Valium!

Um, yeah... I'm kidding.

Sorta, I guess.

At least it's almost over.

Merry Christmas, Happy New Year and oh yeah....

Bah-humbug!